Sunday morning blog time, loves. Please grab whatever beverage you need to get you through this and away we’ll go!
Stop being ok with mediocracy.
I’m talking about the kind of bullshit story that we repeatedly tell ourselves over and over again to make complacency feel ok.
I met a man last night that lost his wife three months ago. He was on a cocktail cruise by himself and I was drawn to ask him why he was by himself; no judgement. Just curious. With tears in his eyes, he told me that he lost his wife three months prior and that they were scheduled to do this cruise tour together. And she had encouraged him to do all the things they were going to do and…that she would still be with him.
That is love. That is devotion. That is divinity. It doesn’t die.
Love like that. Love like you care immensely for that person. There are certain things in life to be semi blasé about and love ain’t one of them.
Look at your career. Sure, we can complain until the end of the day that
we need a paycheck to survive but it’s time to look deeper. Are you satisfied with where you spend 8-10 of your waking hours? If not, responsibly look at your life and seek action to take charge of your own precious and beautiful time given. You can’t get that back.
Friendships. Don’t hang out with people who bring you down and who make it about themselves constantly. You will start to pick up on these traits when they never ask you how you’re doing or check in to see how you’re feeling, etc…I would rather have four quarters than a hundred pennies. Your energy is valuable. There’s a saying that says, “You are the average of the five people you spend time with.” Choose your friendships wisely.
Your health. Ok..you’re in a body. It’s operating. I’m not saying that we should be militant 100% of the time, but eat your veggies, stretch, move around, and drink water. I tell you this as I tell myself. So often we forget to take “me time” just to solely operate on our physical well being. Let’s stop doing that.
Read books. Expand your mind. Learn something new.
Don’t coast through this journey. We are all not getting out of here alive so we might as well live up to our personal potential. I feel it’s time to wake up and start cutting out the mediocracy and start being more mindful about each 24 hours we are given.
Raise your awareness. You’ve got this.
With a smidgen of tough love,
I’m going to give it to you straight. Beware the dreaded “pedestal syndrome”
When someone cannot see any of your imperfections at first and you are “high on ‘love’..” that is so scary. Because there is only one way to go when you’re on a pedestal. And that is down.
Find someone who loves you, stays devoted to you, and won’t give up on you even when you’re feeling unlovable. Because that’s when we need it the most.
Please find your spot to read this little ditty and enjoy.
I’m speaking at a very special event today. My dearest friend and soul sister is putting it on. It’s for the Sparkle Project BC. Basically, it’s an event to remind everyone that we were all born with a sparkle and glow to give to this world and to not let anyone or anything dim that beautiful light. What a thoughtful event and intention.
So often we are squashed by others. It’s been like that since the dawn of time and I would love to just chalk it up to human nature, but I think we deserve more than that. I think our essence is made from love, light, creativity, bliss, loyalty, divine…that feels right, doesn’t it? Anything that’s opposite of that isn’t what we are innately comprised of—sure, we have a myriad of emotions and that’s grand, but I think our general spirit is to reside in joy and playfulness. That’s why we love games, sports, trivia, experiences, etc…because of our playfulness.
I’m going to keep this one short and sweet today, my friends. I have a lot of prep to do for the event.
I’ll leave you with this, though.
Don’t forget who you TRULY are. You are not your bills, your breakup, your flu, your mistakes, your shortcomings, your addictions…
YOU are intricate, complex, vibrant, worthy, consistently growing, learning, and made from love into love.
Go shine and, hey, maybe even sparkle a little.
Sunday morning blog, loves. It’s that time again to grab your tea, coffee, mimosa, smoothie (or all of the above) and gather ’round to read these wee thoughts of mine. I’m having my go to cup of earl grey tea sitting comfortably in my warm abode. Ready to rock and roll? Good.
Today I’m going to talk with you about the awful disease known as “people pleasing.”
We have all done this to some degree in our lives and though it’s not necessarily always a bad thing, it can come to a point where it starts to damage our authenticity and our self esteem.
To desire pleasing people is in our nature. It’s been instilled in us since we were young. We were raised to be polite, be kind and courteous, have good manners, etc…and these are all great qualities to have. Manners should never go out of style.
But there’s this phenomenon that develops outside of that realm and there lies something called people pleasing.
It becomes unhealthy when you start to feel as though you have to compromise your truth and own self to make another person “feel good.”
We know when we are doing it, too. We have that feeling in our chests that doesn’t feel right or good. Of course it doesn’t! It never does when you’re doing something by trying to gain respect or admiration from someone by trying to appease them at the account of losing a piece of you.
You end up resenting yourself for going against what you know and feel to be right and true in that moment.
And guess what? No matter what you do, you can not please everyone.
One of my favourite quotes is this:
“You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there are still going to be people out there who hate peaches…”
What I’m wanting to convey to you today and challenge you to look at is your motives for doing something.
Obviously, we are here to help one other and sometimes that involves sacrificing our time and such. But if you find yourself neglecting your own happiness and worth, it’s time to eliminate that.
I know this to be true:
A) people will take advantage of “people pleasers.”
B) you won’t gain respect, affection, or love by trying to please everyone all the time.
C) you will become a slave to other people and lose sight of who you were beautifully created to be.
My loving advice to you is to just do you. Your tribe will follow. You will attract the right people in your life. Stay strong in your roots and let the love flow in. You are magnificent in your own right. You do not have to prove to people. Everybody has their own stuff going on and it’s very important to operate from a place of self-love. It doesn’t make you selfish; it makes you self aware.
With a little tough love,
Sunday morning blog time, friends. Please excuse my absence this summer as it was packed with all sorts of goodies that demanded my attention away from my blogs.
I’m currently residing on the 25th floor (and I’m afraid of heights, go figure) of my apartment with an earl grey tea a’ brewing and a piece of dark chocolate in hand (because that truly is the secret to happiness)…so, go grab a beverage of choice, find your comfy spot and stay with me for a bit.
How are you?
It’s a question that is heard throughout our days from friends, acquaintances, strangers, baristas, etc…
But I’m asking you now. How are you?
You see, it’s important to keep yourself in check from time to time. It’s important to reflect and take note of your thoughts, emotions, and general well being. Also, it’s crucial to understand that no matter what your current state is, be it good or bad, it will pass and flow through you.
We get so attached to our feelings and thoughts and emotions that we tend to forget that our body is just a vessel, a conductor if you will, to express and experience these emotions. All of the “stuff” that goes on in our head is fleeting and is not to be taken “so seriously.”
What may have bothered you in the 6th grade that was so significant at the time, probably doesn’t faze you in the slightest now.
We are not meant to hold on or grow weary by our emotions or our thoughts or our feelings. They serve us, yes, to play out this human experience we are having on this lovely little planet.
If we get stuck too much in our heads, we will miss out on all the richness and beauty and melancholy and heart tugging experiences around us. We don’t want to become so consumed with our own selves that we miss what the bigger picture is.
This week I challenge you and myself to step outside of our own heads, repetitions, and monotony. I challenge us to connect to the grander scale. Grab a couple of nuggets from what opens up to you and then put them in your pocket and apply it to your life.
Let go and grow.
Sunday morning blog time, my dear friends. Sorry that I have been missing in action as of late…too many festivities surrounding my life so my apologies. Get a cup of your favourite morning beverage and have a wee snuggle with my words.
Ahhh..take a sip. Relaxed? Good.
I’m here to talk to you today about your beautiful life. Oh, don’t roll your eyes at me. Have you forgotten how beautiful your life truly is?
Have you forgotten that you have come this far already? You have battled through odd upbringings, failed relationships, stagnant jobs, math class (the horror!), terrible news, deaths of loved ones, the 2016 American election…yet here you are. In this precious Sunday moment. Reading my goods.
Do I see a small smile of knowingness on your face?
Yes, you have triumphed through the sludge and drudges of life to end up here…with me. And these words. And, in my humble opinion, that current reality isn’t so bad.
Oh, I know your brain. Your brain loves to jump into the past and dwell and sometimes your brain loves to worry about an unknown future. Have you ever asked yourself this…
Does that serve you or others?
Does going over and over in your mind what someone may have done to you in the past or a past regret serve your now? No. It doesn’t. Actually, it takes you away from this Great Game called LIFE! Life is meant to be LIVED and you can only live while you are present.
So, buck up, because I’m not telling you anything your soul doesn’t already know.
It’s time to take the reigns and jump on because before you know it, your precious/beautiful/messed up life is going to be over.
You don’t know when and you will be KICKING yourself if you wait to truly feel alive.
So enough of this living in the past or worrying about the future. It’s all just make believe. Forgive yourself, forgive others and dance your dance.
Shed and be.
I love your faces. Go be fabulous. You owe it to yourselves.
“…The kintsugi method conveys a philosophy not of replacement, but of awe, reverence, and restoration. The gold-filled cracks of a once-broken item are a testament to its history. The importance in kintsugi is not the physical appearance, it is the beauty and the importance that stays in the one who is looking at the dish…”(unknown author)
I love this.
I am laying here as I reflect upon my upcoming engagement party today. I’m thinking about how I got to here and now.
I have been in a few strong relationships in my years and even though they felt right at the time, they ended in heartache. Sometimes it was me who did the heart breaking and sometimes it was I who suffered.
It made me better, though. Just like the kintsugi method; broken but filled with gold.
You see, throughout my 30+ years, I have longed for a beautiful connection with a significant other who could stand the test of time. I had glimpses of it and fragments as well. I was SO certain once or twice with it only to end and now a distant memory.
But guess what? That’s ok. That was my path which led me to where I am today…about to embark on the great journey of marriage and setting up for a party to celebrate our love.
I’m happy with my golden brokenness. The gold is beautiful and soft yet durable. Pain truly can become art.
Remember, my beautiful friends…life is working for you and with you. Do not resist the flow. We are meant to progress.
Enjoy your beautiful brokenness.