Sunday morning blog, loves. It’s that time again to grab your tea, coffee, mimosa, smoothie (or all of the above) and gather ’round to read these wee thoughts of mine. I’m having my go to cup of earl grey tea sitting comfortably in my warm abode. Ready to rock and roll? Good.
Today I’m going to talk with you about the awful disease known as “people pleasing.”
We have all done this to some degree in our lives and though it’s not necessarily always a bad thing, it can come to a point where it starts to damage our authenticity and our self esteem.
To desire pleasing people is in our nature. It’s been instilled in us since we were young. We were raised to be polite, be kind and courteous, have good manners, etc…and these are all great qualities to have. Manners should never go out of style.
But there’s this phenomenon that develops outside of that realm and there lies something called people pleasing.
It becomes unhealthy when you start to feel as though you have to compromise your truth and own self to make another person “feel good.”
We know when we are doing it, too. We have that feeling in our chests that doesn’t feel right or good. Of course it doesn’t! It never does when you’re doing something by trying to gain respect or admiration from someone by trying to appease them at the account of losing a piece of you.
You end up resenting yourself for going against what you know and feel to be right and true in that moment.
And guess what? No matter what you do, you can not please everyone.
One of my favourite quotes is this:
“You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there are still going to be people out there who hate peaches…”
What I’m wanting to convey to you today and challenge you to look at is your motives for doing something.
Obviously, we are here to help one other and sometimes that involves sacrificing our time and such. But if you find yourself neglecting your own happiness and worth, it’s time to eliminate that.
I know this to be true:
A) people will take advantage of “people pleasers.”
B) you won’t gain respect, affection, or love by trying to please everyone all the time.
C) you will become a slave to other people and lose sight of who you were beautifully created to be.
My loving advice to you is to just do you. Your tribe will follow. You will attract the right people in your life. Stay strong in your roots and let the love flow in. You are magnificent in your own right. You do not have to prove to people. Everybody has their own stuff going on and it’s very important to operate from a place of self-love. It doesn’t make you selfish; it makes you self aware.
With a little tough love,