I was never what they considered to be a “cool kid” back in my High School days. Granted, I thought High School was going to be defined by who was the Zack Morris, the Kelly Kapowski, the Jessie Spano, the Screech, and the Slater. I was wrong. Very wrong..
At the tender age of 13 years old, I walked into my school with wide eyes and big dreams. I wanted to be friends with everyone and, for the demise of every teenager, I wanted everyone to like me. I was friendly, awkward, creative, goofy, sensitive, kind of moody, and eager.
I made nice friends and some not so nice. At that point in my life, I didn’t understand why some people were rude to me as I was rarely rude myself. I naively thought that if you put out a certain energy toward people, you were guaranteed to get it back. So, I strived to pour out all the energy that I deemed to be positive, in hopes to get that same vibe back.
It didn’t always work.
I don’t know if it’s the angst of the teenagers or the early mornings or what, but I just did not click or felt a sense of belonging. Reflecting back, I think every one of us who has entered High School has felt that on some degree.
Fast forward 20 years and here I am. A lot has changed in my psyche and the way I view life. I still have a tendency to believe that if we are all made up of the same essence (love, beauty, harmony, greatness) then why don’t we act accordingly and honour that? At thirty something years old, I am still learning that not everybody has the same heart and thought process as myself. And it’s not as though I think that I am right even 70% of the time, but I do know that what I am comprised of is lovely and I like to honour that the best way I can. We cannot expect that people would act the same way that we would in a situation. We are not carbon copies of each other. That’s what makes life interesting.
In my present day with all the experience with people I have had over the years, (trust me, it’s a lot when you are a hairstylist and an actor) I have come to this simple yet vital conclusion:
Be you. Ugh, I know. So cliche. But so true.
Be you in all your glory, ugliness, shyness, quirkiness, beauty, creativity, insecurity, moodiness, and kindness.
The best lesson that I learned from dropping the expectation that people should respond the way that you want them to respond is this:
It has NOTHING to do with you. So be you anyway. Authentically and passionately.